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We are equal but we are not the same

When Islam freed the people from paganism, equality between men and women was established. But somehow, somewhere, women in the west lost true meanings of ‘equality’ and ‘liberation’. As a result, there began a movement whose goal was to have women treated and thought of ‘ the same’ as men – no distinctions, no discriminations. This demand is not compatibles with a woman’s physical or spiritual nature. Because she is created in many ways distinctly different than a man. Modern women want to diminish the impact of these differences. This is an alarming sign that something is quite amiss. Women are not living their lives the way they are entitled, and they do not want to admit having any limitations nor admit their vulnerabilities as women. However, regardless of how much legislation has passed to treat women the same as men, one fact will remain eternally unchanged: the female gender was created with different needs and capabilities than that of male. Not less, not substandard, not lacking – just different. Simply put, a woman and a man should complement each other: ideally they complete each other in marriage.

If feminists achieve their goal to be like men, it will force them to alter their true nature, when they reach the plateau, there will be androgyny. The signs of these are predominantly seen in western societies where women are dressing and behaving aggressively, even ‘ manly’ to prove themselves.

Major differences  between men and women should be mentioned to establish a groundwork first and by far the most major difference between men and women is the fact that the male human is physically stronger than the female. Men simply have a much larger muscle mass than women. Additionally, their bones are larger. Women are usually smaller framed, and they have more fat on their bodies. Women and men differ in their hormonal chemistry. These not only effect personality traits but can also alter the emotions and cognitive functions of the brain.

Hormone level vary between men and women, and they have different kinds of hormones and chemistry make-up. A man’s hormones remain more steady, while women’s hormones tend to fluctuate throughout their lifetime, especially during menstruation, pregnancy, postpartum, and menopause. During these times women can experience swings in body weight, moods and physical stamina. For example, some women experience menstrual periods that are quite debilitating. Most women experience some physical, emotional or mental symptoms related to hormonal fluctuations at this time, and to varying degrees, all women experience some stress-related fatigue or irritability. The condition is so widespread that the medical community coined the term PMS (premenstrual syndrome).

In America, courts of law now recognize this syndrome as a precursor to some violent and even bizarre acts committed by women. In fact, women have used PMS as a part of their defence strategy in court. The attention and approval for the courts regarding these defence motions created quite a stir between both sexes. Certainly, feminists opposed the courts validating this significant gender difference. At the same time, many men railed against the idea  that women should be prosecuted differently because of their hormonal fluctuations. The undeniable fact remains that women are using their physical differences to their advantage in these cases.

Postpartum depression is another physical condition exclusive to the female gender. For some women postpartum depression can develop a few days or even months after child birth. Defence  lawyers argue that this postnatal depression caused their clients to kill or endanger the lives of their new-borns.

Pregnancy is, ofcourse, another major difference between men and women. Pregnancy, childbirth and childbearing is not only physically and emotionally challenging, it is a full-time job. It is also the most significant difference among men and women in terms of role playing. This is the dividing line separating men from women. Pregnancy alters a women’s life dramatically. It is not an easy task. For one, pregnancy  is often a confining period which slows down the body to varying degrees. Women should be given time to recuperate after the birth and given time to care for their baby in safe, peaceful and supportive family environment.

The differences between men and women do not end here. Men and women are not sexually oriented in quite the same way either. Very simply, due to his anatomy and physical strength a man is able to force sex upon a woman, but most women cannot force a man into having sexual intercourse. Therefore, women are more vulnerable to sexual harassment. Can most women physically or sexually threaten a man? Can most women break into man’s house, physically overpower him and then molest or rape him? The answer is obvious.

Another often ignored difference existing between females and males are the ways they are sexually aroused. Studies conducted by behaviourists, psychologists and sociologists have concluded that men are sexually stimulated primarily by visual stimuli. This could explain why men are more gratified by pornographic material than women. In fact, the entire pornographic industry (from publications, female strip shows, topless bars and pornographic films) is male-dominated. , that is men produce it for men. Unfortunately, it is the women who voluntarily contribute to the success of the pornographic empire by debasing themselves in print, film, etc. Although muslim women have been modest and chaste to ensure their protection and dignity for the past 1400 years, it is interesting that modern-day psychologists  are now ‘discovering’ the power of visual sexual stimuli for men and are advising women to dress appropriately to avoid ‘possible problems’.

There also exist fundamental core difference in the ways men and women experience life. Women will admit the difference between sexes when it is convenient to do so. For example, in professional sports or at Olympics, women willingly do not compete in the same sport against men. Conversely, women demand and sue for entrance into Citadel, a once all-male military academy in south Carolina. Although these women might pass the academic entrance exams, physical endurance tests, etc., there seems no cause for celebration. Most people object to seeing their husbands or sons drafted for military duty. And now, mothers, daughters, nieces and aunts are being drafted as well.

This quest for equality resembles other demands from women to be treated the same as men but which enslaves them to the system. It does not promote the family unit, marriage, or the woman’s role as nurturer for her children. Will women be segregated on the battlefield so they will not be raped and pillaged by their own comrades? Further along these lines, it can be predicted that when a female infantry is seized, female prisoners of war will certainly give war a new meaning. They will undoubtedly become victims of the enemy camp. Will her training, physical ability and guns help her there?

Overall, the differences between men and women and the impact they have on women is astounding. Why these issues continue to be brushed aside is unbelievably degrading and dangerous for women.

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About Imran Ali

IMRAN ALI, is an up-coming writer and columnist. His studies were interrupted when he, as a child of 14, simply told his father M. Sulemen, a businessman, that he just can't get what his school teacher teaches paying little attention to the weak students of the class. So, on a promise that he'll 'study at home' he never again saw the face of the school, though he carried his studies well to fullfill the promise of his; his experience as a volunteer(a dedicated social worker) provided him with material for his articles and writings. He first gained attention with ''Aurangzed as he was'' and ''New world Order 'Vs' Just world Order'' (September 2011, The Companion, English monthly, and several other magazines), probably his finest articles. Next 10 year he coming with his debut novel, and is fully dedicated on it's research. Taken together, his articles present a broad, naturalistic picture of Indian life. His subjects include History, the Indian peasantry, the bureaucracy, life of a downtrodden Indians and have nots, the emotional problems of the different classes, and, ominously, hallucination, Very new in Style and to Approach, Combining psychoanalysis with human behaviour. His writings well captures the collective psyche of the world as a whole. He's been a district level boxer. Known as a peoples magnet in his vast friends circle, and a booklover who humorously with pride discloses, '' I've read over hundreds of books relating to arts, literature, science, metaphysics, naturopathy and psychlogy. So, the conclusion here is easy to derive, that i, who was raised from childhood in a modern muslim belief have been mostly preferring reading all kinds of books rather than writing!'' His reading since childhood, has been mostly centered around knowing the truths[truth here means of all kinds humans ever categorized, mysteries and human psyche has given me a better understanding of the human soul, mind and spirit in collaboration with my Islamic teachings.] Since he started his reading at the age of 15 reading Stories of literary giants, like Leo tolstoy, George Orwell, and Guy de muppasant and many Indian masters like Sir Mohammed Iqbal(The Poet Of the East), Margret Marcus, Leopold weiss, and Manto. And their collective influence made me search for my own moorings, adapting my father's style of srorytelling. In the beginning, there was nothing magnificent in acquiring all this, from books, as it was nothing more beside his own interest, and his interest to help morally deprived and confused men he used to meet in parties and gatherings. And amazingly, only a few years back, an up an coming, extraordinarily talented writer and one of his closest friends of his, who always loved his ideas gave rise to a writer hiding somewhere inside him. When while sipping the tea he insisted him to collect his ideas in a diary which keep on counselling youngmen of varieties every third day resulting in a great interruption in our appointed informational communication. Suddenly, at the very instinct, the idea occured in his mind of writing down these ideas effectively, concisely and pertaining to the questions of todays' youth who are short of time resolving them. And with him as his inspiration, he picked up the pen, and started unfolding, writing in the name of the architect of this whole universe. Which is none other than ''Allah.''

14 comments on “We are equal but we are not the same

  1. Really nice…..free from unnecessary gender bias

  2. “A man who is shy & modest is an amazing character,but a woman who is shy & modest is beyond amazing” -Abu Bakr As-Saddeq (راضي الله عنه)

  3. The west women were asking eagerly about equality.
    They have been equaled the men by going to barber but the barber didn’t find in their faces the BEARD.
    There’re also great west inventions, they invent the speed in love, so the man accept an “hour-wife”.
    In addition, they invent Women’s freedom, this bring “the father” from the street, so she could throw “the son” in the street…

    • In the Quran, reference to men and women is through attributes and deeds, by which we will be judged. The most pious of us, or those who follow God’s commands, are referred to as “believers” or “mu’mineen” (pl.) in the Quran. In many references, in fact, the Quran resonates this equality by eloquently repeating “men and women” with ethical and practical qualities throughout the verses, and even emphasizes this ten times in the following verse:

      “Verily for all men and women who have surrendered themselves unto God, and all believing men and believing women, and all truly devout men and truly devout women, and all men and women who are true to their word, and all men and women who are patient in adversity, and all men and women who humble themselves before God, and all men and women who give in charity, and all self-denying men and self-denying women, and all men and women who are mindful of their chastity, and all men and women who remmber God unceasingly: for all of them has God readied forgiveness of sins and a mighty reward.” (33:35)

      It is paramount to understand tha tthe Quran equates being a “mu’min” (sing.) with actual practice, so that it is not enough to just have faith in principle; we must put our faith into practice. The same applies to our belief in the equality of men and women; gender equality as outlined in the Quran must also be put into practice. In reference to the above verse, modern scholar Laila Ahmed in “Women and Gender in Islam” says that “the implications are far-reaching. Ethical qualities, including those invoked here–charity, chastity, truthfulness, patience, piety–also have political and social dimensions.”

  4. Gender equality should mean equal standards, not in the matter of dressing or working, but in the matter of social and religious norms which are practiced discriminately in certain countries including ours.

    • While the spirit of Islam is clearly patriarchal, it regards men and women as moral equals. Moreover, although a man is technically the head of the household, Islam encourages matriarchy in the home. women may not be equal to men in the manner defined by Western feminists, but their cores difference from men are acknowledged, and they have rights of their own that do not apply to men

  5. While as Muslims we can surely express the beautiful spirit of Islam and teach the West numerous lessons, we would mostly gain from self-introspection.

    Today, I was denied entrance at the local mosque in Amsterdam, Netherlands where I rush to pray every day so I offer my prayers on time.. skipping on a short 30 minutes lunch break.
    A man had complained. A women comes to pray… reaching, discretely, face down the separate women prayer room for few minutes.

    My throat got tighter as I was thinking… I condemn western societies – as French Muslim women wearing my modest hijab – for limiting my God-given rights to practice my religion, today, it is my community that shuts the door of the “house of God” upon my heart. Have we regressed to the point of losing sight of the essential, the core of our prophet(saw)’s teachings and our faith.

    On this note, I got back to work sad and silent…

    • Truely Pathetic. We muslims should be ashamed of ourselves. When we go on complainig what the non-muslims are doing to muslim, the question that needs to be asked is, are we doing enough to reform our own community?

      As one scholar put it, Nothing is going to give success to the muslims of today, except what gave success to muslims of the time of the prophet (PBUH). It is sticking to Quran and Hadith. How can we expect Allah to grant us succes and honour when we go on opposing the command of the prophet (PBUH)?

      Dr. Jeffrey Lang has written quite a lot on these issues and the harm that this has casued to the ummah. Here is a clip from his lecture which highlights the seriousness of this issue.

  6. There is no doubt that a woman’s prayer in her house is better for her than praying in the mosque, as is indicated by the Sunnah of the Prophet (Peace & Blessings of Allaah be upon Him). He said: “Do not prevent your women from going to the mosque, even though their houses are better for them.” (Reported by Abu Dawud in al-Sunan, Baab maa jaa’a fee khurooj al-nisaa’ ilaa’l-masjid: Baab al-tashdeed fee dhaalik. See also Saheeh al-Jaami‘, no. 7458).

    Whenever a woman prays in a place that is more private and more hidden, that is better for her, as the Prophet (Peace & Blessings of Allaah be upon Him) said: “A woman’s prayer in her house is better than her prayer in her courtyard, and her prayer in her bedroom is better than her prayer in her house.” (Reported by Abu Dawud in al-Sunan, Baab maa jaa’a fee khurooj al-nisaa’ ilaa’l-masjid. See also Saheeh al-Jaami‘, no. 3833).

  7. Umm Humayd, the wife of Abu Humayd al-Saa‘idi reported that she came to the Prophet (Peace & Blessings of Allaah be upon Him) and said: “O Messenger of Allaah, I love to pray with you.” He said: “I know that you love to pray with me, but praying in your house is better for you than praying in your courtyard, and praying in your courtyard is better for you than praying in the mosque of your people, and praying in the mosque of your people is better for you than praying in my mosque.” So she ordered that a prayer-place be built for her in the furthest and darkest part of her house, and she always prayed there until she met Allaah (i.e., until she died). (Reported by Imaam Ahmad; the men of its isnaad are thiqaat (trustworthy)).

    But the fact that praying at home is preferable does not mean that that women are not permitted to go to the mosque, as is clear from the following hadeeth:
    From ‘Abdullah ibn ‘Umar, who said: “I heard the Messenger of Allaah SAWS (peace be upon him) say: ‘Do not prevent your women from going to the mosque if they ask your permission.’” Bilaal ibn ‘Abdullah said, “By Allaah, we will prevent them.” (Ibn ‘Umar) turned to him and told him off in an unprecedented fashion, saying: “I tell you what the Messenger of Allaah (Peace & Blessings of Allaah be upon Him) said, and you say ‘By Allaah, we will prevent them’!!” (reported by Muslim, 667).

  8. But there are conditions attached to the permission for women to go to the mosque, as follows:
    (1) She should wear complete hijaab.
    (2) She should not go out wearing perfume.
    (3) She should have the permission of her husband.

    Her going out should not involve any other kind of prohibited acts, such as being alone in a car with a non-mahram driver. If a woman does something wrong like that, her husband or guardian has the right to stop her; in fact it is his duty to do so. And Allaah knows best.

  9. But irrespective of what is better, ultimately it is the woman’s choice. No man has the right to stop her from going to a mosque, as per the prophet’s command. Ofcourse Hijab has to be maintained, but that applies to the man as well. Even the man has to maintain his hijab.

    The report of Mujahid ibn `Umar:
    “The Prophet (PBUH) said: `Do not prevent the women from going to the mosque at night’ One of the sons of `Abdullah ibn `Umar said, `We will not let them go out because it will give rise to deviation and suspicion.’ Ibn `Umar rebuked him and said, `I tell you that the Messenger of Allah (PBUH) said such-and-such and you say, “No, we will not let them”!'”See Sahih Muslim, 4/161, 162, Kitab al-salah, bab khuruj al-nisa’ ila’l-masajid.

  10. Allah equal between all creatures in many things,right of life,freedom,eat,drink,dignity,& all of them are share with water,air,earth’s products.
    Can we say because all of that the animals are same people??
    Children can do everything as adults??
    Equally not the same as similarity.
    All rational foreign women know about how that Muslims women are have their rights with dignity.

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